Proper 16B, 2024

Text: Ephesians 5:22-33

Title: Romance

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I don’t like romance stories.  Whether it’s a romantic movie, a romance novel, or whatever, I just don’t like them.  I remember having a school assignment where we had to do a book report on a romantic story, and I remember going to the librarian, and asking her to help me find a romance novel for someone who didn’t like romance novels.

The reason why I don’t like romances is that they are so predictable.  They are boring.  You know that the leading man and the leading lady are going to fall in love and be together in the end.

Of course there will be complications, bumps along the way.  There will be misunderstandings or fights or something to draw them apart.  But, in the end, they always overcome all obstacles and end up together.  Boring.

Now the story of the Bible, the story of God and His people is a romance.  It’s a love story.

But what makes this love story different is that it’s completely unpredictable.  There are twists and turns along the way that you can’t see coming.  And it doesn’t end the way that you would expect.

The biggest surprise is this: you are the one whom our Lord falls in love with.

But you are not the typical leading lady.  You don’t care about our Lord.  You don’t love Him back.  In fact, you’re His enemy. 

You love other gods more than Him.  You love money, you love your family, you love yourself more than Him.  You don’t give Him your time and attention.  You’ve got other priorities.

And because of all of your faults and flaws, you’ve become dirty, ugly, and completely unlovable.

This is a greater complication than you’ll find in any other romance story.  It’s not like a girl trying to choose between two different guys, deciding who she loves more and who she really wants to be with.  She’s completely devoted to one and has completely rejected the other. The other guy is not even in the picture because she hates him, can’t stand him.

That’s what makes Jesus’ sacrifice so great. 

Jesus doesn’t die for someone who loves Him back. You can probably imagine doing that, right?  Dying for your family, dying for your friends, dying for your country.  You can imagine giving your life for those who love you.

But can you imagine dying for your enemy, dying for someone who hates your guts, dying for someone who has completely rejected you?

Can you imagine an American soldier during WWII, giving his life for the Nazi soldier who is trying to kill him?

Jesus’ love for you was so great that He died for you before you loved Him back.  He died to wash away your sins and make you loveable. 

There’s a reason why you were dressed in white at your baptism.  At the font you were washed with water and the word.  You were purified, sanctified, every spot and blemish washed away.  Your baptismal gown is also your wedding gown. You were made loveable, holy in Holy Baptism, so that you could be the bride of Christ, so that you could be together with Him forever.

In the most unexpected plot twist ever (although you should have seen it coming), Jesus rose from the dead and ascended to heaven.

And eternity will be one long marriage celebration that will never end, with Jesus and His bride, the Church, together forever. And it’s all because of His sacrificial, unpredictable love for you.

And since you’ve been loved in such a way, that’s how you are to love one another.

Husbands, this is how you are to love your wives. Not because she’s earned it.  Not because she’s the perfect wife, but simply because you love her. 

Your love flows from your marriage to her.  God has joined you to her as one flesh.  You are now one body, just as Jesus and the Church are one body. 

Nourish her, care for her, just as you would care for your own body.

Don’t be demanding and domineering.  Don’t insist on getting your own way.  Put her needs first.  Love her the way that Jesus loves you.

Wives, as your husband loves you in such a way, honor him, respect him, and yes, submit to him as you would to our Lord.

He is the head of your household. 

Don’t disrespect him, don’t talk down to him, don’t say negative things about him to your friends and family. 

But support him, encourage him, love him in the way that you love Jesus.

Sacrificial love is difficult for both husbands and wives. What God is calling you to do here is hard. 

And all husbands and wives will regularly fail in their calling.  This is the most intimate of all relationships, and it’s the one where you can hurt someone the most.

When you fail, confess your sins to one another, and receive the forgiveness that comes from Jesus Christ.  Don’t keep score or hold grudges, but forgive one another fully and freely, as Jesus has forgiven you.

For those of you who are not married and hoping to be so one day, this is what you look for in a future husband or wife—someone who will love you in the way that Jesus loves you, and whom you can love in such a way, too.

Marriage is not about what you get out of it, how you benefit from the relationship, but it’s about how you can use the gifts God has given you to love and care for another.

Find someone you can love in the unexpected, unpredictable way that Jesus loves you. 

And whether you are single or married, divorced or widowed, know you are precious and valuable to Jesus Christ.  His love for you does not depend on your ability to find a husband or wife or to keep your marriage together.  You are beloved to Him, no matter what anyone else thinks of you.

In the end, we are all part of the one body of Christ.  We are all, collectively, together His bride.  He gathers us all together week after week in the name given to us in our baptism, he gathers us all together around His altar to eat and drink His body and blood given and shed for us, and He will gather us all together around the throne in white robes when the heavenly wedding banquet begins.

And the great romance story, the love story that began even before creation will truly end happily ever after. 

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